On Losing Faith
November 3rd, 2007 by natalie
Have you ever felt the silence of God? Have you ever thought you knew what God’s will was and then found out that you were wrong…completely wrong? Have you ever felt on the edge…of losing your faith?
Several weeks ago, I commented in a phone conversation to a wise friend that I had grown much less confident that I could know with certainty that something was the will of God. She sweetly replied that that was probably a sign of maturity. While such an attitude could very well be a sign of maturity in some instances, God made it clear to me several days later that such was not the case in this instance. Those words were not spoken in maturity, but in unbelief.
Over the past couple of months, the heaviness of some difficult situations was beginning to take its toll on me. I kept trying to do the right things, to have the right responses, but I found myself slipping closer and closer to the edge of my faith. For several weeks I felt almost constantly that I could completely lose faith. I felt the weakness of my own faith more intensely than ever before. And I didn’t know what to do about it. Until I read one morning the familiar account of God calling Moses in Exodus 3.
My attention was drawn to the disparity between God’s words and Moses’ responses. God was trying to give Moses a little glimpse into His plan for delivering the Israelites, but Moses kept turning the conversation back to himself, his part in the plan and his inadequacies to accomplish it. If he could have seen from God’s perspective he would have realized that God already had every detail, every response from Pharaoh, every “glitch,” every supernatural sign orchestrated to result in an outcome that would bring Himself the greatest glory. All God required of Moses was that he listen to Him and do what He said. Listen and obey. That would require unwavering faith and confidence that God knew what He was doing and would clearly lead the way.
Faith can be expressed by believing that God will speak clearly when He wants me to make the next move. All I have to do is listen and obey. There is no room for cynicism and unbelief. God wants faith and without faith it is impossible to please Him. By faith I believe not only that God is, but also that He is a rewarder of them that earnestly seek Him. Faith is asking for wisdom and then believing, and not doubting, that God will give it.
God does not want us to despair of knowing His will or of being led by Him – whether generally or specifically. Let us rather live with idealistic faith than with cynical unbelief. Even if God seems silent, let us not waver in unbelief, but let us endure to the end with a heart of faith. Let it be said of us, “They died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth.” Hebrews 11:13
It seems to be the current “in thing”. We must “know the will of God” and we must know it right now. I’ve found that a lot of churches and families are doing lots of “strategic planning” like the world and yet you don’t find any of that in Scripture.
What you do find is ordinary, faithful people doing ordinary things in service to God and when God has a job to do He picks one and uses them to His glory.
It’s so easy to get disheartened when we do the same things every day and seem to see it going no where. We confuse faithfulness with service– and think that doing something means more to God than being someone.
Thanks for the encouragement, and the challenge.
Thanks for the comment, MInTheGap. I just listened to a sermon from John Piper along these lines that was very thought-provoking:
What is the Will of God and How Do We Know It?
You said: “We confuse faithfulness with service– and think that doing something means more to God than being someone.”
This is so true…and something that I think I am constantly relearning!
I appreciate your thoughts.
~natalie
Natalie,
I read this the other day and thought it was very interesting. Now I think it has answered some of my prayers. How? Early today I decided to take a day of fasting, prayer, and seeking for God’s will about the laptop you had offered. I’ve spent most of the time writing thoughts, praying, and seeking counsel from my two wise parents.
I then came across a verse in Proverbs chapter nine that said…
If you are wise, your wisdom will reward you.
So then I remembered this post and linked it together with thoughts I had been thinking…
“I’m just not sure, I just don’t know?” I’ve seen God’s will! HE is giving me an opportunity to invest in something while I’m still young.
I was having a hesitation of fear from Satan saying “no, no, not a good idea!”
But then I had this faint voice of God saying, “If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it. Gen 4:7
This will be his, and He will get all the glory and credit! I need to take the step of faith. Because I know it’s in his hands.
Romans 4:21
being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.
Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the Lord with all your heart…
I will continue to seek God’s wisdom by searching through his word. Then see what you think.
THANK YOU so much for this post Natalie! I love you so!
Hey Little Sis!
You are such a great example of one who is seeking the Lord with her whole heart and redeeming the time for His glory. I’m excited to see how you are growing in your faith and how you are finding great blessing and guidance from the Lord through His Word. Keep pressing toward the mark! (Phil. 3:14)
I love you!
~natalie